IMPROPER LANGUAGE USE
Haciendo limpieza en el correo me he encontrado con este mail que me enviaron hace siglos. No se si alguna vez lo haberis leído (probablemente sí) pero a mí todavía sigue haciéndome reir. Siento que esté en inglés pero sino perdería gran parte de la gracia.
Por lo visto, en el extranjero, especialmente en Londres, creen que los españoles tenemos un lenguaje..."rudo". El texto que sigue es un correo electronico que se mando desde una oficina londinense a sus empleados espanoles, para que moderaran su lenguaje (lenguaje espanol, por supuesto).
FROM: Group Offices London
TO: All Spanish Staff
SUBJECT: Improper Language Usage
It's been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our headquarters that the Spanish staff commonly uses offensive language.
Such behaviour, in addition to violating our group's policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and the staff itself.
Therefore it is requested to our Spanish staff to adhere immediately to the following rules:
1. Foreign colleagues or visitors should not be referred to as "mira ese guiri de mierda" or "passa de ese polaco".
2. Words like "cono", "hostia" and other such statements will not be used for emphasis, no matter how heated the discussion is.
3. You will not say "la ha cagao" when someone makes a mistake, or "la esta cagando" if you see somebody being reprimanded or "que cagada!" when major mistake has been made. All direct or derived forms of the verb "cagar" are inappropriate in our environment.
4. No Project Manager, Section Supervisor or Head of Administration Chief, will be referred to, under any circumstances, as "el hijo de la gran puta",or "el muy cabron" or even "el comemierda".
5. Lack of determination will not be referred as to "falta de huevos" or "mariconez" nor will persons with a lack of initiative be ever referred to as "capullo" or "acojonado"
6. Unusual and/or creative ideas shall not be referred to as "pajas mentales" in particular when they stem from your manager.
7. You will not say "como me jode" if a person is persistent, or "esta
jodido" or "se lo van a follar" if a colleague is going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, when matters become complicated the words "que jodienda" should not be used.
8. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say "vete a tomar polculo", nor should you ever substitute the most educated "may I help you?" with "que cono quieres ahora?"
9. If things get tough, an acceptable statement such as "we are going through a difficult time" should be used rather than "esto esta jodido" or "nos van a follar a todos". Additionally, if you make a mistake, just say so and do not say "que putada" or any statements composed with the root "puta".
10. No salary increase shall ever be referred to as "subida de mierda".
11. Last, but not least, after reading this note please do not say "me voy a limpiar el culo con ella" or "me la paso por el forro de los cojones".
Just keep it clean and odorless and dispose of it properly.
PD: Curiosamente he encontrado la versión mexicana del mismo.
Por lo visto, en el extranjero, especialmente en Londres, creen que los españoles tenemos un lenguaje..."rudo". El texto que sigue es un correo electronico que se mando desde una oficina londinense a sus empleados espanoles, para que moderaran su lenguaje (lenguaje espanol, por supuesto).
FROM: Group Offices London
TO: All Spanish Staff
SUBJECT: Improper Language Usage
It's been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our headquarters that the Spanish staff commonly uses offensive language.
Such behaviour, in addition to violating our group's policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and the staff itself.
Therefore it is requested to our Spanish staff to adhere immediately to the following rules:
1. Foreign colleagues or visitors should not be referred to as "mira ese guiri de mierda" or "passa de ese polaco".
2. Words like "cono", "hostia" and other such statements will not be used for emphasis, no matter how heated the discussion is.
3. You will not say "la ha cagao" when someone makes a mistake, or "la esta cagando" if you see somebody being reprimanded or "que cagada!" when major mistake has been made. All direct or derived forms of the verb "cagar" are inappropriate in our environment.
4. No Project Manager, Section Supervisor or Head of Administration Chief, will be referred to, under any circumstances, as "el hijo de la gran puta",or "el muy cabron" or even "el comemierda".
5. Lack of determination will not be referred as to "falta de huevos" or "mariconez" nor will persons with a lack of initiative be ever referred to as "capullo" or "acojonado"
6. Unusual and/or creative ideas shall not be referred to as "pajas mentales" in particular when they stem from your manager.
7. You will not say "como me jode" if a person is persistent, or "esta
jodido" or "se lo van a follar" if a colleague is going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, when matters become complicated the words "que jodienda" should not be used.
8. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say "vete a tomar polculo", nor should you ever substitute the most educated "may I help you?" with "que cono quieres ahora?"
9. If things get tough, an acceptable statement such as "we are going through a difficult time" should be used rather than "esto esta jodido" or "nos van a follar a todos". Additionally, if you make a mistake, just say so and do not say "que putada" or any statements composed with the root "puta".
10. No salary increase shall ever be referred to as "subida de mierda".
11. Last, but not least, after reading this note please do not say "me voy a limpiar el culo con ella" or "me la paso por el forro de los cojones".
Just keep it clean and odorless and dispose of it properly.
PD: Curiosamente he encontrado la versión mexicana del mismo.
5 comentarios:
La lengua la hace el pueblo! La escritura la rigen los académicos, pero la lengua pertenece a todos. Reprimir el uso de palabras malsonantes es mutilar el idioma.
"Hijo de puta hay que decirlo más"
que risa, jajaja
muy bueno el correíto.
Muy grande!
Y muy propio de los british.
Qué bueno! me lo mandaron en español y te juro que me hizo igual de gracia o más, contando que yo de ingles voy más que flojilla.
oaby, yo soy más de decir furcia pero bueno joputa también vale.
serjuzu, me alegra que te haya echo reir. Ale! ya tienes regalo de cumple.
pei, como siempre , sólo me queda darte la razón (y aprender la coreografía del tutu, claro).
marujilla!,yo me sigo quedando con el inglés, como dice pei, es muy british. Y oye pa llevar mal el inglés gintonic lo pronuncias muy bien!
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